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Old 09-15-2007, 06:53 PM   #1
fox
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Talking vicevi...malo da se zabavljamo
reko malo da se zabavimo, neka ovo bude thread za viceve i salu, malo da se opustimo, kad niste u poslu i kad nemate nesto konkretno da postujete, bacite koji vic ovde pa da se ismejemo... smeh je lek za sve... evo da ja pocnem prvi:

Upada frajer sa fantomkom i pumparicom u banku i trazi pare...

Kaze sluzbenica izvini nije ovo banka novca, vec sperme..

Repetira ON pumparicu i trazi 3 flase sperme..

Stavlja ONA na sto i ceka..

POPIJ!!!, kaze ON.

Uzme jednu i popi ONA, malo se mrsti...

POPIJ i te dve..

Uze ona i popi preostale dve...

Skida fantoimku njen muz i kaze: VIDIS ZORICE DA SE MOZE!!!!!!
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Old 09-16-2007, 03:06 AM   #2
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hehe dobar je
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Old 09-16-2007, 11:49 AM   #3
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he he i meni se svidja
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Old 09-16-2007, 01:11 PM   #4
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bolesno i gadno ali je dobar
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Old 09-16-2007, 01:28 PM   #5
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Dodje mali retard kod doktora, sedne na stolicu i doktor mu kaze:
"Dishi"
A mali odgovara:
"Tu sham"
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Old 09-16-2007, 02:28 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nenad
Dodje mali retard kod doktora, sedne na stolicu i doktor mu kaze:
"Dishi"
A mali odgovara:
"Tu sham"

lol,hehe
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Old 09-16-2007, 04:04 PM   #7
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Profesor objasnjava studentima osnove obdukcije.
-Glavne su dve stvari. Prva je da pobedite gadjenje i odvratnost. Pazite sada.
Profesor gurne prst u bulju mrtvaku koji je lezao na stolu, izvadi ga i polize..
-Hajde sada svi vi ponovite ovo.
Prebledeli studenti svi ponove ovu radnju, stave mrtvaku prstenjak pa polizu prst, jedva se suzdrzavajuci da ne se ne ispovracaju.
Profesor tada nastavi sa predavanjem
-Druga, isto tako vazna stvar je koncentracija i pomno pracenje predavanja. Ja sam u analni otvor gurnuo kaziprst a polizao srednji prst. Dakle, dobro pazite...
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Old 09-16-2007, 06:35 PM   #8
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Sedi betmen na krovu zgrade i pusi buksnu. Navario se ko guzica a u tom trenutku ispred njega proleti supermen. Betmen uvlaci zadnji cim i kaze: "Ma jeeeste!"
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Old 09-16-2007, 08:19 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Adult Place
Profesor objasnjava studentima osnove obdukcije.
-Glavne su dve stvari. Prva je da pobedite gadjenje i odvratnost. Pazite sada.
Profesor gurne prst u bulju mrtvaku koji je lezao na stolu, izvadi ga i polize..
-Hajde sada svi vi ponovite ovo.
Prebledeli studenti svi ponove ovu radnju, stave mrtvaku prstenjak pa polizu prst, jedva se suzdrzavajuci da ne se ne ispovracaju.
Profesor tada nastavi sa predavanjem
-Druga, isto tako vazna stvar je koncentracija i pomno pracenje predavanja. Ja sam u analni otvor gurnuo kaziprst a polizao srednji prst. Dakle, dobro pazite...

AU BRATEEE nesto mi se slosilo od smeha
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Old 09-16-2007, 08:48 PM   #10
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ovaj za studente je do jaja... , evo jos jedan od mene:

70 stvari koje treba idealna zena da zna....
da kuva i 69!!!
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Old 09-28-2007, 08:14 PM   #11
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bump

kako se drugacije zove plavusa lezbejka?
- steta
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Old 09-30-2007, 11:01 PM   #12
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sede dva talibana u avionu, dolazi stjuardesa i pita ih: hocete nesto da popijete, kaze jedan: ja cu viski, a drugi ce: necu nista vozim za pet minuta...
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Old 09-30-2007, 11:23 PM   #13
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Kako papa pocinje govor?
Ahtung ahtung
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Old 10-01-2007, 05:09 AM   #14
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Vic iz 1992...

Ide Perica sa caletom na nudisticku plazu ali zbog preteranog psovanja otac ga zamoli da se na plazi ponasa kulturno, kao i sva ostala deca...

...

Kad su nasli slobodno mesto kaze otac Perici da on ide po sladoled, a da se on ne pomera sa lezaljke...

Perica pogleda pored sebe i ugleda zensku bujnih grudi i dlakave picke koja se toliko otvorila kad je devojka rasirila noge da Perica nije skidao pogled sa nje...

Vraca se otac a

Perica ga upita: "Tata, sta je ono?"
Pericin otac: "Pa devojka" ...

u tom trenutku devojka pogleda u njih dvojicu jer joj se ucini da pricaju o njoj...

Perica: "ma ne to, nego sta joj je ono dole, izmedju nogu?"
Pericin otac: "a to sine, pa to je ovaj...LAV...jel vidis gore mu je griva a dole su mu usta?"

Perica: "STA JE ZINUO na mene JEBEM GA U USTA"
Last edited by Maki : 10-01-2007 at 05:11 AM.
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Old 10-01-2007, 05:23 AM   #15
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Mali Perica prvi put došao u pozorište sa dedom ljubiteljem opere.
- Ko je onaj čika koji nam je okrenuo leđa? - upita unuk.
- To je dirigent.
- A zašto preti štapom onoj teti?
- Ma ne preti joj, Perice...
- Ne preti? A zašto onda ona toliko vrišti?
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Old 10-02-2007, 10:56 AM   #16
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nije vic, ali je istinito
---------------------------

Srećno gospodine Gorski

20.7.1968 godine, komandant svemirske letelice Apolo 11, Nil Armstrong, bio je prvi čovek koji je spustio nogu na Mesec. Nakon toga izgovorio je čuvene
reči: "Ovo je mali korak za čoveka, ali veliki za čovečanstvo". Ove reči čuli su milioni ljudi na Zemlji. Pre nego će isključiti aparat za komunikaciju za Zemljom, Armstrong je dodao jednu enigmatičnu rečenicu:"Srećno, gospodine Gorski!" Mnoge osobe koje su tada radile u NASA-i pomislile su da se radi o nekom sovjetskom rivalu. Nakon sto su pregledali sve liste kosmonauta, ustanovili su da nikakav Gorski nije naveden u njima. Svaki put od tada kada bi se Armstrong pojavio pred novinarima, oni su mu postavljali pitanje da im razjasni značenje te rečenice. Svaki put on bi se samo nasmejao.

5. 7. 1995. u Tampa Beju, Florida, jedan je novinar ponovo postavio to pitanje, staro tada 26 godina. Ovaj put Armstrong je odlučio da napokon odgovori. Gospodin Gorski bio je već dugi niz godina mrtav, te je astronaut pomislio da je doslo vreme da razjasni ovu misterioznu rečenicu.
Daleke 1938. kada je Nil bio dečak igrao je bejzbol sa svojim prijateljem.
Lopta je odletela u susedno dvoriste, gde su stanovali gospodin i gospođa Gorski. Nil je otisao po loptu, i dok ju je uzimao, začuo je kako gospodja Gorski urla svome muľu: "Da ti popusim? Ti bi da ti ja popusim, je li? E, pa hoću, ali kad ovaj klinac u dvoristu bude hodao po Mesecu..
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Old 10-02-2007, 11:33 PM   #17
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hahahaha brate mili nisam znao za ovo ali je mnogo dobro
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Old 10-06-2007, 06:06 PM   #18
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Nije vic... al' je smeshno:

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Old 10-07-2007, 04:29 AM   #19
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Nije VIC ali ne mogu da se nacudim...

Novak Djokovic: voleo bih da igram u dresu crvene zvezde...

Kosanovic: Djokovic moze dobiti priliku da ovog meseca zaigra na jednoj od prijateljskih utakmica...

Administrator AdultBizForuma:
Jedva cekam!
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Old 10-07-2007, 09:43 AM   #20
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evo vic...

voze se dva pedera u taksiju, skroz izfeminizirani, prefinjeni itd
nakon par minuta voznje jedan od njih kaze: "Ja se unapred izvinjavam gospodine, obracajuci se vozacu, i tebi dragi ali moram da prdnem."
onda se nakrenuo na levu stranu i prdnuo tako tiho da se jedva culo...
voze se oni dalje kad posle par minuta drugi peder rece: "I ja se unapred izvinjavam gospodine, obracajuci se vozacu, i tebi dragi ali moram da prdnem."
onda se i on nakrenuo na desnu stranu i prdnuo tako tiho da se jedva culo.
voze se oni dalje kad posle par minuta vozac rece dubokim muskim glasom: "Momci i ja se izvinjavam ali moram da prdnem." Onda se malo napeo i odvalio trrrrrrrtttt tako jako da su svi zivi culi
Ova dva pedera se samo pogledase i kroz smeh podrugljivo rekose: "Hahaha DEVICA"
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